


The Stuck Surprise

by Emejig16



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Hospital Visit, M/M, Smut, Vibrators
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-06
Updated: 2017-09-06
Packaged: 2018-12-24 07:31:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12007992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emejig16/pseuds/Emejig16
Summary: Sometimes, things get stuck where they probably shouldn’t.





	The Stuck Surprise

**Author's Note:**

> New A/N: This fic was originally written and posted August of 2013. I don't know if you guys remember that twitter thread of the guy that got a vibrator stuck up his butt and had to go to the emergency room and had this whole ordeal ,but I thought it was hilarious and it inspired me. Accuracy of any of this is to be overlooked but ah it was a different time. 
> 
> Original A/N: Hey there! So, I hope you enjoy this fic..it certainly is…different but um.. yeah! It based off of this post so….

Dan had pinned me to the bed, mercilessly kissing, sucking, and biting my neck. His warm lips, the trailed all along the area, moving tantalizingly slow over my adam’s apple, causing my whole body to tingle and shiver with pleasure.

Tonight, was going to be the most _fervent_ nights of them all.

I had no idea what had Dan so excited, but I’d never seen him so passionate or loving. All he’d said was, “He had a surprise for tonight, if I was up for it.” I didn’t know what he was getting at, but I could never say no to Dan, for the adventures he took in the bedroom were _so_   _stimulating_.

Dan removed his lips from my neck, and reattached them, catching my lips in a heated kiss. His tongue immediately finding its way to mine, gracefully gliding with it, as he started rubbing his leg up against he inside of my thigh.

He broke this kiss first, loosening his grip of my wrists. I could still feel his eyes, boring into my flushed face, as I took in a couple of deep breathes.

“Fuck, you’re gorgeous,” Dan said using one of his hands to sweep my hair out of my face. 

“You’d be one to talk.” I responded.

He chuckled, and removed his other hand from my wrist, using it to balance himself. He sat up and removed his shirt.

“So, when do I get to see this "something special” for tonight?“ I asked, sitting up too.

"You’ll see eventually,” Dan said .

“Is that so?” I asked sultrily. I moved closer to him, and started to lick and bite his ear. “What is it?” I whispered in between nibbles.

“ _Patience,_ ” He cooed. “Now, lay down and close your eyes.” Dan said getting off the bed.

“Face down or up?" 

"Actually, don’t lie down. Just close your eyes." 

I closed my eyes in anticipation. I really didn’t know what to expect, but I was ready. After a few minutes, I heard a buzzing noise right up against my ear. I opened one eye.

It was the vibrator. 

"Surprise!” Dan exclaimed.

I opened my other eye to confirm the item. We hadn’t used it in _ages_ , but the few times prior that we had…Let’s just say I was twitching by the time we were done. I didn’t know what to say, so I just bit my lip.

“I put fresh batteries in it too.” Dan said, switching it off. He sat down on the bed next to me. “Pant’s off.” He commanded.

I did as he said and removed my red plaid boxers, leaving me completely exposed in front of Dan.

He leant against the head board and patted his lap, telling me to come and sit there. I did as he said.

“Do you have the lube?” I asked.

He reached behind him, under the pillow and pulled out the bottle. “Mhmmm. You don’t need stretching right?”

“No, I don’t think so…”

“Okay, Tell me when you’re ready by lifting your hips up.” He said running his finger up and down my spine.

“Okay.” I said. I then moved my hands so that I’d have some balance and lifted my hips for Dan.

I watched as Dan grabbed the white vibrator. He placed it down softly next to him, before covering his fingers in lube. He shifted a bit, moving me with him. Quick kisses were being given as a single digit drilled itself at my entrance. I didn’t  think need stretching, but better to be safe than sorry, right? Then again, it wouldn’t be the first time I’d be sitting in pain all day for Dan. I’ve done it many times anyways.

I felt it ease its way inside, Dan kissed me as he intruded me. I met his kiss with equal amount of force. The first finger was the easiest to get in, it never took longer for the second, Soon, he was adding the second, and thrusting the couple slowly. I was scissored a few times before a third, finger was added. Moans trickled out from m.

My body jolted up from the unexpected minor thrust. I allowed my moans to stream out perfectly, and loudly. Dan released me from the hold on my lips, both gasping for air. 

“Sorry.” Dan said guiltily. “Got a little carried away there,”

“S'fine.” I panted.

Dan removed his fingers from me, and grabbed the vibrator. He, snickered as he covered it in lube. He was so excited, and it was so cute.

I sat, waiting for my treat. Closing my eyes, as silence fell among the room. My cock was up against my stomach, begging to be touched, but I refrained.

Dan positioned the vibrator against my hole. He pushed it in slowly, I groaned as I felt it slide into me.

“Mmph Dan..“ I moaned.

He steadily started thrusting it in and out of me, letting me get used to the feeling before switching it on. "C-can I switch it on.” Dan practically panted.

I nodded, and before I knew it my whole body tingling. 

Dan’s hand soon found it’s way to my dick, soon to stroke it in time with his movement, while the other worked its way on the vibrator. Dan arched his neck to kiss me passionately, instantly having my tongue greeted with his.

The streams of moans just filled up my whole being, the only thing that I could communicate to Dan with in a time like this. It was just the way the vibrations traveled throughout my whole body, inciting waves of pleasure all over.

Then, Dan turned it up even more, and then set it to full blast. I couldn’t take all this pleasure so fast, groans and whines just continued on forth as I was hit on that little spot inside me, making me scream out Dan’s name. 

I was in so much pleasure, that I hadn’t even realized that Dan had stopped stroking me, and was stroking himself with his now free hand. I’d forgotten about just how much Dan got off to this.

I took it upon myself to rub my own dick. My orgasm was coming on quickly at this rate The toy pressed up against my prostate, electrifying vibrations on it, while I worked my dick, thumbing my slit every time up. 

“D-Dan..c-clo-se” I sputtered out. Then Dan turned down the setting and angled it right against my prostate.

I couldn’t control myself any longer. Before I knew it, I was cumming all over my chest, and judging by Dan’s moans, he was climaxing too.

“uh..Phil…” I heard him moan. “ _Fuck_ , I love you.”

We stayed the way we were as we came down from our intense highs. I closed my eyes, as I focusing my breathing. The room was silent, aside from the sound of our heavy breathing ,and the faint buzz of the vibrator. _Oh yeah_ the vibrator; it was still inside of me. I was waiting for Dan to pull it out, but then he didn’t. Just then, I felt a poke at my side.

“Uhm..Phil. We _may or may not_ have a problem right now.” Dan said uneasily.

“What?” I said craning my neck to look at him. He slowly raised both of his hands and chuckled nervously. I was confused at first, but then I realized what the problem was.

The vibrator was _still_ inside of me, he didn’t have a hold on it anymore, and it was still on.

“What are we going to do?” I asked.

“Well, I attached an emergency string just for this kind of situation. I could pull it out that way.”

“Fine, just do it.”

“Okay, get on your hands and knees.”

I positioned myself as, he’d requested.

“Ready?” Dan asked, running his finger over my spine.“

I took a deep breath. I needed to be relaxed if this was going to work. "Yes.”

I felt Dan tug at it, causing me to wince a bit. He then pulled a little harder. It looked like this method was going to work-that is until the string broke.

“Shit!” Dan exclaimed.

“What?!” I asked very concerned.

“The string broke, but I’m going to try and pull it out with my fingers.”

I rolled my eyes. “Okay, just get this thing out of me!" 

I felt as Dan tried to slide his fingers back into me, trying to grasp it, but I’m almost positive all he did was push it in further.

"Shitshitshitshit.” I heard Dan mutter,

“Dan…” I said. “Please tell me you got it out…”

He chuckled in disbelief. He went and grabbed the box of tissues from the bedside table. He threw me a couple. “Get cleaned up and dressed. We’re going to have to go to A&E.”

I turned and looked at him exasperatedly. He had to be joking. He hadn’t seriously gotten this thing stuck in me. “You’re kidding.”

“I wish I was.” He said looking already looking for clothes.

“How do you even get a vibrator stuck in someones butt!”

“Gee, don’t you think I wish I knew.” He sassed.

I groaned, and gingerly got up from the bed. I wiped off my chest, and went to go throw the tissues away. I didn’t realize it was going to be this uncomfortable to walk. The walk to the trash bin was a short one, yet I was already having to support myself on the side of the dresser. 

Dan threw me a pile of clothes. “Here, put those on.”

I was only able to get the shirt on by myself. 

“Dan you’re going to have to help me get my pants and trousers on.”

He started laughing. “Oh my god Phil. I don’t believe I need to help you with this.”

“Shut up, this is _your_ fault.” I said. You could practically hear the pout in my voice.

After about a fifteen minute struggle, we’d successfully gotten them on and were getting ready to leave. We grabbed our phones and keys to the flat.

“Should I call a cab? Or would you just like to waddle there.” Dan teased, as he pulled out his phone.

“Call the damn cab.” I said firmly. I was in no mood for jokes.

Dan rolled his eyes. “Lighten up sweetie.” After a short conversation Dan hung up and slid his phone back into his pocket. “They’ll be here shortly. Let’s go wait outside.” He said extending his hand to me.

I looked at him and walked out of the flat by myself. I heard him sigh, before closing the door behind himself.

The cab pulled up a few minutes later. Dan told the driver where we were going, as I slowly, but surely slid my way into the back seat. Dan got in next to me and we were off.

“I can’t believe it actually got stuck.” Dan said, laughing a bit.

I crossed my arms and looked out the window. I refused to talk to Dan. There was nothing remotely funny about the situation to me. He stopped laughing and sighed again.

“Phil, you know I’m really sorry.” Dan finally said.

I just looked at him and said nothing.

“Please talk to me baby.” Dan said, as he ran his finger up and down my side comfortingly.

I sighed. “I know you are, but really Dan. There is a vibrating vibrator with fresh batteries inside of me, that _you_ put there. I _think_ I have a right to be a little pissy about that.”

“Don’t worry about it. The doctors will get it out.”

“Yeah, but it’s going to be embarrassing! Who gets a vibrator stuck in his butt?”

Dan giggled a bit. “I’m sure they’ve removed worse things from people’s bodies.”

“But not sex toys!” I argued.

“Just relax. They aren’t going to judge. After all, accidents happen."

After about another fifteen minutes, we were pulling up to A&E. We both got out of the cab, and Dan paid the fare. He grasped my hand tightly.

"Let’s get this thing removed!” He said starting to walk, forcing me to walk with him at his pace. We walked in through the glass sliding doors and then walked to the desk to check in. 

The lady with the curly brown hair working the desk looked up at them. “And what seems to be the problem?”

“Uhm..well you see….well…uhm…ah..we kind of…well, him really..like he kind of-” Dan tried to explain before I cut him off.

I looked the lady right in the eye. “Look, I have a vibrating dildo stuck in my butt.” I said, feeling my cheeks heat up at the sheer ridiculousness of the situation.

“ _Right._..if you could just fill out this paperwork, then we’ll call you back momentarily.” The lady said stifling giggle.

I filled in everything that was needed and handed the papers back to the woman.

“Thank you.” She said. “You’ll be called back soon.”

“Okay.”

I went to go sit next to Dan, who was evidently amused with the whole situation.

“See that wasn’t so bad.” Dan said resting his hand on my thigh.

“I feel ridiculous.” I sulked. 

“Well…you do have a vibrator deep inside you so-”

“Can we just not talk about it?” I asked, resting my head on his shoulder. I already felt exhausted.

“Okay sweetie. Just so you know, this is going to make a funny story one day." 

I giggled at the thought. Oh would this be _quite_ the story to tell.

We sat like this for somewhere close to thirty minutes, before I was finally called back.

"Phillip Lester.” A nurse called.

I perked up at the sound of my name. Finally, I was going to get this thing out of me. I got up from my seat and waddle-walked through the door the nurse was holding open. She then lead me to another room and instructed that I put on one of the hospital gowns from the drawer. I did as she said and then waited on the bed. The nurse then preformed typical tasks such as taking my blood pressure, checking pulse, and heartbeat. I had to awkwardly tell her that it was still on, because she kept redoing the heartbeat because she said she was hearing something strange.

I then had to get an X-ray to confirm that there was in fact a vibrator inside of me, and to see just how deep it was. Apparently it was pretty far in there because, after they looked at the results they told me that they were going to sedate me and remove it through minor surgery.

And about four and a half hours later from when we’d initially arrived at A&E, the vibrator had finally been extracted. I couldn’t even explain how thankful I was for that thing to be gone. 

I was resting in one of the beds, waiting for the doctor to give me the all clear to go. As I waited, Dan was allowed to come and see me. 

“Hey Phil.” He said a he walked up to my bedside.

“Hi.” I said still a bit groggy from the sedative.

He started to run his hand through my hair. “How are you feeling?”

“Better. _A lot_ better. A bit empty too…”

Dan giggled.“The doctor said you were going to be really sore tomorrow.”

“Aww what?” I whined. “That’s going to suck.”

“Yeah and you shouldn’t insert anything in your anus for a week.” Dan said, trying not to burst into a fit of giggles. He was just so amused with my misfortune.

“I hate you so much.” I said blushing.

“No you don’t.”

“Yeah, you’re right. If I didn’t love you I wouldn’t have ended up in this mess.”

“So you’re not mad at me?” Dan asked innocently.

“Oh no, I’m still mad at you. But, it’s the good kind of mad.” I said taking his hand and squeezing it.

A small smile appeared on his face. “So you forgive me?”

“Of course I do. I could never stay mad at you. I’ll always find a way to love you.”

“Even when I accidentally get a vibrator stuck in your ass? Dan questioned.

"Even when you accidentally get a vibrator stuck in my butt.” I confirmed.

_God, the things I go through for you Dan._


End file.
